Funny stories

An old woman was lonely. She decided to get a pet, She didn’t have much money so she went to a second hand pet shop.

She saw many animals: a three legged cat, a dog without a tail, fish that could only swim backwards and a beautiful bird that could only say one thing, “Who is it?” and She decided to buy buy the bird. She bought a cage for her bird and went home. She put the bird by the door and went downtown to do some shopping.  

While she was gone, a man knocked on the door.  

“Who is it?” replied the parrot.

“It’s the butcher,” he said.  

“Who is it?”, repeated the bird.

“It’s the butcher,” said the man.

“Who is it?” asked the parrot.

“It’s the butcher!!,”, said the man angrily.

“Who is it?”           

“It’s the butcher!!!!”, he screamed.  

“Who is it?”       

“It’s the butcher, the butcher, the butch…”

Suddenly the butcher fell to the floor. He had had a heart attack.  

Later that day, the old woman came home and found the man laying on her doorstep. She opened her door and asked the parrot, “Who is it?” . The parrot replied,  

“It’s the butcher!”

Source: eflclassroom.com

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Funny stories

The Bank Job

When I first started working in a bank in the center of the city, I was always afraid someone might rob me. I was behind bulletproof glass, but the alarm buttons always reminded me that someone could rob me.

We had secret signals that changed every day, and there was an automatic alarm that rang when the last money came out of my drawer.

Sure enough, one day a man I thought looked suspicious entered the bank. He walked by the other tellers to come to me. I thought he knew I didn’t have much experience. He put his hand into his pocket, pulled out a note, and put it under the teller window.

I was very scared, dropped down under the counter, and hit the alarm button. The guards came and held the man.

Then I read the note. It said, “Would you have lunch with me?”

Next Funny stories: The Smartest Man in The World