The Salesman

Funny stories in english elementary

  Henry Leech was a salesman. He was a good salesman and sold lots of vacuum cleaners. One week, the manager sent Henry into the countryside to sell.  

He drive out of town and stopped at a farmhouse. He knocked on the door and the farmer’s wife opened it. Henry started into his speech immediately.  

“Mam, how much time do you spend sweeping the floors? “ “A lot of time. This is a farm and things get dirty quickly.” said the woman.

“And how much time do you spend beating the carpets?” asked Henry.

“A lot of time. This house gets dusty and my dog also lays on them”

“Well” said Henry, “This is your lucky day.”   Henry showed her his vacuum cleaner and said,   “You can clean the house in 5 minutes with this!”

The farmer’s wife didn’t look interested. Henry took out a big bag of dirt. He opened it and threw it all over the floor. The farmer’s wife was very surprised. Before she could speak Henry said, “ Mam, if this machine doesn’t pick up every last piece of dirt, I will eat all of it!!!!!” The farmer’s wife looked at Henry and said,  

“WELL, I WILL GET YOU A SPOON.    

WE HAVE NO ELECTRICITY.”

Next Funny stories: THE BIRTHDAY PRESENT

Source: eflclassroom.com

Vocabulary

English	Pronunciation	Russian	Spanish	Indian	Chinese
salesman	[‘seɪlzmən]	продавец	vendedor	विक्रेता	推銷員
sell (sold)	[sel]	продавать	vender	बेचना	賣
vacuum cleaner	[‘vækjuːmˌkliːnə]	пылесос	aspiradora	वैक्यूम क्लीनर	吸塵器
countryside	[‘kʌntrɪsaɪd]	деревня	campo	ग्रामीण इलाकों	農村
drive	[draɪv]	ездить	conducir	चलाना	駕駛
farmhouse	[‘fɑːmhaus]	дом на ферме	casa de Campo	फार्महाउस	農家
speech	[spiːʧ]	речь	habla	भाषण	言語
immediately	[ɪ’miːdɪətlɪ]	немедленно	inmediatamente	हाथोंहाथ	立即
spend	[spend]	тратить	gastar	बिताना	花
sweeping	[‘swiːpɪŋ]	уборка	barrido	झाड़ू मारना	籠統的
floor	[flɔː]	пол	piso	मंज़िल	地板
farm	[fɑːm]	ферма	granja	खेत	農場
thing	[θɪŋ]	вещь	cosa	चीज़	事情
get	[get]	получить	obtener	प्राप्त	得到
dirty	[‘dɜːtɪ]	грязный	sucio	गंदा	臟
quickly	[‘kwɪklɪ]	быстро	con rapidez	जल्दी जल्दी	很快
Say (said)	[seɪ]	сказать	decir	कहना	說
beating	[‘biːtɪŋ]	избиение	paliza	पिटाई	跳動
dusty	[‘dʌstɪ]	пыльный	polvoriento	मटमैला	塵土飛揚
lucky	[‘lʌkɪ]	счастливый	suerte	सौभाग्यशाली	幸運
Show (showed)	[ʃeʊ]	показать	espectáculo	प्रदर्शन	顯示
Take (took)	[teɪk]	хватать	Tomar	लेना	採取
Throw (threw)	[θrəu]	бросать	lanzar	फेंकना	扔
surprise	[sə’praɪz]	удивление	sorpresa	अचरज	驚
can (could)	[kæn]	уметь	poder	कर सकते हैं	能夠
dirt	[dɜːt]	грязь	suciedad	गंदगी	污垢
electricity	[ˌelek’trɪsətɪ ]	электричество	electricidad	बिजली	電力

Funny stories in english elementary

The Dog

Linda Robinson was very thirsty so she went into a cafe. There was an old woman in the cafe. She was sitting near the door at a table. At her feet, under the table, there was a small dog.  Linda bought a glass of lemonade and some cookies. She sat down at the table next to the old woman.

The old woman sat quietly. She looked lonely. Linda decided to be kind and talk to the old woman. “It is very hot today.” she said.  “Yes, but it is nice inside here.” replied the old woman.

Linda looked at the dog and asked, “Does your dog like people.” The woman answered, “Oh! Yes! She loves people.” Linda wanted to give the dog a cookie. So she asked, “ Does your dog like cookies?”

“They are his favourite food.” said the old lady. Linda was terribly afraid of dogs so she asked, “Does your dog bite?” The old woman smiled and said, “ NO! My dog is very tame. She is even afraid of cats!”

Linda took a cookie in her hand and reached under the table. She put it near the dog’s mouth. But the dog didn’t bite the cookie, she bit her hand! Linda jumped up, spilling her lemonade. She screamed, “I thought you said, your dog didn’t bite.”

The old woman looked at Linda and then at the dog.    Then she said,  

“THAT’S NOT MY DOG!”